Memories are made of these!

Looking at the world through rose-tinted glasses, or remembering the “good old days” through a sepia lens is a common enough form of selective memory.

But it is equally easy to let negative incidents cloud or affect one's overall memory of a trip. (This comes naturally to me, because as someone I met over the weekend said—Singaporeans are the best whingers in the world—topping even the British!)

So, as I revisit this neglected blog after close to a year, and reflect upon my original intentions for setting it up— I decided to stick to my initial premise— to appreciate the little moments of every trip and simply celebrate how lucky I am to have gone on each trip. After all, what’s the sense in spending time dwelling on the bad stuff? 

Self discovery

Travel is supposed to broaden one's mind. I think it also allows you to delve deeper into what's already existing as well.

Here are some of the insights I gleaned about my travelling-self.

1. My way or the high way

I’m a pretty impatient person on a regular day--and when it comes to travelling, that part is super heightened because-- So little time, so much to do!! I need to make sure that I’m doing things in the most efficient way to maximise the trip (this doesn't necessarily mean squeezing in all the sights-- it just means no waiting around!). Else behold the wrath of passive-aggressive, grumpy travelling Rachel! For instance, if I’m the best navigator in the group, I'm going to take full custody of the map and you are just gotta follow my pace. No time to waste telling you which subway line to take or why we are walking north-easterly in this tiny alleyway.  If you don’t like it, either learn to read a map or go your own way.

2.I’m a travel snob

I have a love and hate affair with being a tourist, and I abhor anything that is remotely touristy. (I just have this delusional idea that I’m an extremely well-travelled world citizen) Of course, the irony is not (entirely) lost on me. Everything I know about a place before I go is read off the internet, most likely written by a tourist, so what makes me think I’d be the first to discover XXX? For instance, when it comes to eating, I have this highly irrational barometer called “are there any angmohs in the joint”. And if they are, this would instantly bring my enjoyment of the place down by 30%, because the place is not longer "undiscovered". (Obviously this only applies to Asian countries) Double the irony there because I usually read reviews written by ANG MOHS! Note to self: learn the local language and read some local blogs!

3. I’m a food snob

I go either really cheap or the other end of the spectrum. I love street food and love to eat where locals do, even if its dirty, dodgy or by the road. On the other hand, I don’t believe in scrimping (within reason) since I’ve already travelled so far, I don’t mind spending on expensive meals in the best restaurants (of course, not having much money, I do things like eat at those places during lunches). I just turn up my nose at mid-range, chain restaurants or those in touristy areas—as I have a mental schema that those would be not value for money or not authentic. Mostly I’m right on the money, but I stand correctly on occasion, since standards differ across country. For example, even the restaurants opposite the Duomo in Florence had such beautiful and affordable food, whereas the kaiseki place smack in the middle of Gion I knew was a mistake the minute I stepped foot in (which self-respecting kaiseki place has proper seats instead of those uncomfortable tatami mats? (p/s: Yoshinoya in Japan is dirt cheap, chain but the best fastfood ever)

4. I’m getting old!

I get tired and grumpy on any flights over 4 hours these days, have to take pre-emptive motion sickness pills, and need days to recover from travel. When can I ever afford business class?! 

5. Same same but different

Getting tired of the touristy sights interspersed with shopping and eating. I’m not sure whether this is me being jaded or the world is getting smaller—it really is all Uniqlo and Starbucks and McDs and busloads of tourists whether in bamboo forests or snowy mountains or Gothic churches. Buying souvenirs seems passe now since everyone travels so frequently that no one really cares about receiving gifts from foreign lands that they would be visiting in the next month, or can buy from taobao. Even uploading photos and checking in on FB (which was not big until the last few years) feels like a social obligation (As someone said…“whats the point of travelling if no one knew you were away?”). Yet, I feel inertia to go on REAL adventures to Cuba or North Korea or New Caledonia or Bhutan, and lack the courage to pick up snowboarding or horseriding or diving... 

Home, truely

9 August

Singapore

This is not strictly a travel post but it is about a country, so I'm just going to stick it in here anyway.

If you told me ten years ago that I would ever love my country, I would never have believed it. No one who knew me then could ever have pegged me as a patriot or even think to have that conversation with me. I'm sure I exuded "I despise my country" vibes. Even the dentist who extracted my wisdom teeth  said "You don't look like the sort of girl who has deep roots"..

Speak not to me of the irony that I had consciously made the decision at 18 to bond myself to the country for the formative years of my career-- that I can only attribute to momentary folly and flight impulse going in overdrive.  Then, the thought of spending my college days in Singapore filled me with dread (you cannot blame me, I went through one of the uni orientation programmes), that I had to find an escape route by whatever means that I would. I considered myself above the hoi polloi-- the arrogance of youth! Living the consequences of my decision perhaps coloured my view of the world, of my country, in all aspects of my life.

In the past few years (coinciding with a change in career direction, impending middle age, and permanent brain damage caused by alcohol poisoning), I started to see Singapore as being "not so bad anymore".

Strange things have started happening with alarming frequency, such as having a real admiration for the new Singapore skyline, putting my hand up for things like OSC and NDP tickets, having to choke down tears while reading inspirational propaganda stories about ordinary Singaporeans, and watery eyes watching Pink Do 2013 video with the Home theme song for the 20th time.. (although I'm sure some of the tears coincide with PMS)

LST asked last night, after we were done ogling men-in-uniform from the National Day parade, if I would stay in Singapore forever. She does not intend to come back for good, as she does not consider herself to have strong ties here. CST and I rmused that while this had been our sentiment when we first came home years ago, we now can see ourselves living here for the rest of our lives.

Reflecting on what has changed, I have to say that it isn't just growing patriotism or a result of Singapore becoming more livable (although a much better selection of good bars and restaurants has definitely helped!). There definitely is a strong dose of realism and practicality as well. One gets set in one's old ways and used to routines and people.

I don't know if I can say, hand on heart, that I love this country of mine. Life here was not as comfortable as I remember growing up. I go about daily life living the challenges and uncertainties and inconveniences that every Singaporean must live. I get irritated by the stupidity and obnoxiousness and concrete thinking of my fellow Singaporeans all the time. But like every dysfunctional home, you make the best of it and try to be invested in it.

Of course, should there be opportunities to work and live abroad, I would definitely be keen to explore give them a go (High Openness to New Experiences on my psychological profile) but now any such decision that I make in that department will no longer be due to push factors or angry feelings or resentment but because I truly would like to pursue that opportunity for its own merits.

Scenes of Singapore: Amber Road, Tiong Bahru Bomb Shelter, Marina Bay Skyline, View from MBS Sky 57, East Coast Park, Ah Meng's descendants, Sentosa aquarium, Beach bar on Sentosa

                                       

You don't know how strong you are until......

22-27 July 2013

Bangkok, Thailand

This was a most opportune trip in many ways. But it was also very very heavy going.

The 11 days since my previous trip to Hua Hin had been very emotionally tumultuous  and work-wise had been nothing short of crazy-- and the 21st in particular had been particularly tumultuous.

That week, I had difficulty sleeping (I was now the first to arrive in the office when I would normally have been one of the stragglers-- and...no taxi either!) and barely ate. Food has always been important to me, but now I could not finish half a plate. The plus side was that I lost enough weight in that week to be able to feel svelte again and part of my brain was pleased about that. But I was literally fearful that I would not be able to physically get through what promised to be an intensive week of stand-up facilitation, which I had been experiencing great anxiety about already even before the emotional drama.

Fortunately or unfortunately, I had my monthly tour to conduct at the museum on the 21st, which I worried I would not be able to deliver coherently. As it turned out, I was able to hold it together that hour, and was able to entertain the group, which included some trainee tour guides from some tourism academy. When I overheard them say that I had given a great tour, I realised that I would be alright in Bangkok after all.

Bangkok was tough, no question about it. The participants had a really great week with short training days, and plenty of time to shop in the City of Angels, but I was definitely put through my paces with 14 hour days, 10 of which invariably involved me standing in 3 inch heels (By Day 4, I was training people barefoot). Nights were then spent working on emails and trying to resolve some of the emotional upheavals, so sleep was sorely lacking. By now, my body was so exhausted that I did at least manage to fall asleep without much difficulty, although I would wake at 5 every morning to worry about the day's facilitation. For the first time ever, I made it to breakfast every single day of the trip (usually I average zero).

It was really difficult to stay switched on, keep my game face on, but I guess I did alright given the circumstances. I even managed to reach out and counsel a colleague going through a rough time at work.

For the first time in a long time, I felt proud of myself and of what I was capable of. And that's something not to be sniffed at.

Yes, sometime, work really can take your mind off things.

This was actually the first trip that I prioritized people over what I wanted to do. Typically when I travel alone or for business, I would make sure that I have enough time to do what I want ( if I plan anything at all) before I even think about meeting up with friends in those countries. But this time, I did actually plan ahead to meet with some ex-colleagues. Sadly, I had to cancel on one due to work, but I managed to meet with B at Siam Paragon (where I did my only shopping-- spicy peanuts for CK and some crackers for the folks).

Pretty amazing that only having known each other for a couple of weeks in the summer of 2011, we still had loads to talk about, and I even was able to pour out my angst to her (sorry B!).

The Saturday, I changed my flight to an earlier one so that I could see M sooner. This is turning into a SOP for each trip. What happened next is another story...

In anticipation of sadness and in need of moral support, I snuck baby into my luggage. She hasn't travelled since UK 1999. Here she is with a Thai aromatherapy pot.

1st time in a long time!

7-11 July 2013

Hua Hin, Thailand

Its been a long time since I've been to a new place for the first time. I hate to admit it, but it does say something that I've increasingly realised about myself-- with age, I just get more comfortable going back to the same places over and over again. Its much easier to plan, I know what to expect, its comfortable! (But then again, haven't been travelling much for leisure, its been all work trips-- so no choice-- although to be honest with myself, I have been getting cozy with going back to Hong Kong, Taiwan, Bangkok etc rather than taking the plunge with Cuba, Africa or other places.)

Anyway, so Hua Hin for work!

I never really understand the lure of beach resorts. Lying on a deck chair under the blazing sun to roast is nowhere near my bucket list, and I could never abide by cheap massages that everyone always hankers after. Pedicures done abroad never fail to disappoint, so just about the only think about beach holidays have been swimming and eating. Nonetheless, I always enjoy Thailand so yay!

Now I wish I could work ON a beach resort. Even though Singapore is sunny 365 days a week, I would never be in a mood to rock up to work in fancy sandals and a sundress, which I could conceivably do during this 1 week business meeting. Work felt so breezy-- to look out of the canteen and see a gorgeous pool, or the horizon....beautiful!

Resortwear!

First thing I did-- have  water melon juice right next to the beach! Weather was a little gloomy but it was still nice and hot (not humid). All the stress of a 3 hour car ride to the resort disintegrated right there. Now, if only I could appreciate massages....

Natural high from my non-alcoholic water-melon freeze!

Another great part of the trip was reliving the memories of all the time I spent in Thailand 2 years ago. From the Kao Soi Gai to the Amazon cafe yen at the rest stops along the highway to the choc-and-banana prata-crepes at the nightmarket...SO MANY GOOD MEMORIES! Even some of my Thai was coming back to me.
OK I lie. I never had any Thai in the first place.

The first time I had this was in a tiny coffeeshop off central Chiangmai. I  had never even see the Northern Thai Curry Chicken Noodle Dish before but had been enticed when I saw some customers wolfing it down. Now my favorite Thai dish (well, one of my favorites anyway!) or perhaps it is just the memories of Chiangmai that I love.

Definitely enjoyed the travel-and-leisure element of this trip very much. I swam most days before breakfast! (When I had breakfast) Even though I was too shy to be seen in my bikini knowing that colleagues would be all around, and had to wear top and shorts to the pool-- so no tan!, that couldn't detract from the peacefulness of the swim.

Infinity Pool

I think as I get older, I learn to appreciate everything more.
Being able to take a dip in a beautiful pool in the morning.
Enjoying a cold drink by a not-so-photogenic beach (even though hell would be starting soon).
Having a bubble bath while watching BBC (No HBO!)
Life is really good!

I couldn't resist another watermelon juice to go with my soak!

Eating my words

Singapore

Never thought that I would say this but I actually miss those business trips to Jakarta!

My colleagues were all in CGK this last week and gallivanting around having bakso and seafood and lapis.

To be fair, I never had any of those those things whenever I was there but that's not the point!

Miss Mulia and watching Keeping Up with the Kardashians on cable whilst doing last minute decks.

Miss the oxtail fried rice at the airport waiting for the forever-delayed-flights, and real thick avocado drink (not the milked down version we get here).

I guess I really just miss travelling for work (although I do believe I will never miss the daily trips to KL!!)

So be careful what you wish for cos it might just come true!

My perpetual love affair with....Hong Kong

30 March- 2 April 2012

Hong Kong

Is it loserish that despite everything that has happened, reliving this trip makes me happy?

Hong Kong is a place I've always had an affinity for-- friends, places-- or maybe its having grown up on a diet of TVB dramas and movies--it just always seemed to be the place I was destined to have a relationship with.

I have very clear memories of the trip (which is rare for memory-challenged me). Only good memories-- despite the fact that cognitively, I do remember certain parts of the trip where I was sad or angry, but somehow my mind (heart) has blocked off all negative moments. Perhaps it is a little like how the love for a new baby makes mothers forget the pain of childbirth? Or maybe it was simply because the trip had taken place amidst a consistent low that it became such a highlight of that time.

I arrived at Hong Kong via train. It wasn't at all difficult or chaotic at all at the train station, unlike what I read online-- which goes to show that I really should improve on my Mandarin so that I can read Chinese reviews of Asian places, rather than having to rely on gweilo commentary all the time.

From the Hong Kong train station, I realised I had no idea how to get to the hotel. (great planning again, Rach!) I figured that Hong Kong taxis aren't that expensive, so just hopped on to a cab and was done with it. Of course the taxi had to be unfamiliar with the area (CAUSEWAY BAY!) so in the end I still had to lug my bags over some cobblestones to the hotel which had a very inconspicuous sign.

Not as inconspicuous as an old lady selling sex toys! 

Butterfly on  Morrison is a pretty good choice next to Causeway Bay. Its not expensive by the territory's standards but was also nothing too memorable. The only thing I can remember is the three-storey CK underwear ad that the window opened to. Neon green briefs. Nice.

Holly and Leon came up to the room after their work and we waited for JL for dinner. His flight was like five hours late wtf. Dinner was a hole in the wall seafood place that Leon knew well. Delicious! The owner PRed super well with everyone except me with my rubbish Cantonese couldn't understand.

After dinner was drinks at LKF then we headed home on the tram. JL grew up spending summers here so he was very familiar with directions, and I followed him like a spaniel. I've been here probably more than 10 times in as many years but I can never navigate anything apart from Mong Kok Centre.

You know how Hong Kong movies/TV always have scenes where people take the tram late at night and there is no one in the upper deck so its uber romantic and atmospheric (or sometimes, with a lone sleeping dude for contrast)? That night was like that for me (I don't mean the sleeping dude!).

Sometimes when I am on holiday, I don't really live in the moment fully, or enjoy it for the experience. After the holiday has ended, I might have a general sense of having enjoyed myself, but at each and every point, something might have been going on (usually in my head) that did not allow me to entirely immerse in the present, that made that point a little unpleasant in some way-- always something small like a minor tiff, half-thinking about work, feeling too hot, too full etc. I personally find it difficult to live in the moment generally I guess because I'm always thinking and analysing. So I guess I need to be thankful that just for these few moments, I let myself go and really embraced them.

Looking back, I feel that night pretty much sums up our whole relationship--beautiful, transient, not very real (all shadows and neon lights playing tricks on my mind). All that was lacking is a soulful cantopop tune.

Over the next few days, we did a day trip to one of the outlying islands, visited salsa clubs, wandered in the back alleys around the hotel, ate at Meixin's and McDonalds, walked some more.

Now my memories of Hong Kong will always include him.

Where do you get a lobotomy when you need one?

A must-eat for me every time I come,
ever since I first had it as a kid

One of the best egg tarts

Travel buddies

Potato's motto for travelling with good friends has always been "Go as friends, come back as friends"

I think there is a lot of truth in that. Travel should be all about enjoying the experience and the moment, and a big part of that is the companionship (or lack thereof).

Travelling together can be stressful, so it is important to set the right expectations when holidaying with others, especially when you still want to remain friends after the trip! While I don't think it is necessary to be on the same page all the time, there must be agreement and ground-rules (budget, pace, sights come to mind)

Even with good friends, it is important not to take things for granted, be presumptuous or generally behave like a spoilt brat. (This is particularly true when you travel with a partner, as one tends to be more selfish and all princessy! Not a good habit at all)

Anyway I've realised that I travel well with particular types of people. I hope the feeling is mutual!

1. "Impromptu"/non- decision makers

I've noticed that a lot of my friends are really last minute when it comes to making travel decisions-- so our trips always are rather haphazard. At the same time, such people are perfect travel companions as we tend to be easy-going about itineraries and do not really mind taking a detour down an interesting looking street.

This is my preferred travel style-- so I seldom do much planning. I usually only have a couple of things that I really want to do, but otherwise I'm happy to go where the mood brings me. 

I used to struggle with this as I felt that I was not maximising my tourist experience and taking in all the attractions, but now, I've come to realise that I much prefer walking around randomly and "feeling" a place rather than rushing around taking photos of key tourist sights which more often than not, are simply underwhelming. Having said that, I do recognise the need to take some effort to read up, as I sometimes so come away from a place feeling like I haven't experienced it at all. 


2. Inquisitive, observant and introspective people

Sometimes I feel I go through life like a horse with blinkers on. As a result, I miss out on interesting sights, people and sounds. So I really like travelling with people who are more curious and observant. as they often point out to me really cool things that make a trip so special. And I always love hearing about people's reflections on trips. 

Oh dear, not sure what I can offer in return?


3. Fun, interesting and sociable people

This is a no-brainer. I've quite boring myself, so I always love to travel with people who know how to have a good time, can talk about anything and everything, who can be silly and liven up a long train-journey when boredom sets in. oh it helps if they don't judge me for indiscriminate cam-whoring.



I'm such a leech, I know.

4. People who can shut up

You know how some people are uncomfortable with silences? Being with anyone twenty-four seven is no joke (not sure how married people do it), and introvert that I am, I need to have down-time, without feeling guilty for not making conversation all the time.

Usually in the evenings, I like to stare at the TV (In my defence, I'm deprived without cable-TV at home, so soaking up mindless entertainment in hotels is a must for every trip) or something. 

Sorry to everyone who has had to endure my slack-jaw, non-communicative self when travelling with me!


5. Navigators

Hoping my furry friends would read the map for me

Writing this post makes me realise how lazy I am with trips! I hate to navigate so it is always great to have someone who knows how to read a map or is instinctively good with directions! I am perfectly happy to take a wander around blindly. 






Gosh i think I must come across as a lazy, boring, stroppy, uncommunicative travel brat. I'm amazed at why people want to go on hols with me. I think I better reflect on what kind of travel buddy I am. Otherwise, people won't want to travel with me anymore!!

The Thing About Travel

Today after a tough day at work, was missing a little bit of Korea. So off I went to my favorite Korean auntie-stall in the old shopping centre near my home, for a steaming bowl of spicy tofu soup.

This used to be my all time favorite stall. But recently, it has been letting me down. Maybe it is the price increase (this used to be $5, now $7.50!). Maybe its cause the Korean auntie has delegated the cooking to someone else. But it no longer tastes the same especially after the Korea trip where we had the mother of all tofu soups! Makes you wonder, if travel broadens the mind, or narrows it, if I can no longer enjoy what I used to because of travel experience :(

Rules of Engagement

1. One trip, one entry.

Even if I have been to a place more than once, since the purpose of this blog is to reflect on what I've experienced/learnt/enjoyed.

(business trips and fly-in-and-out ones are excluded cos that would be too crazy)

2. Pictures speak a thousand words

At least one photo per entry. And I'm gonna try to include a picture of something I bought/collected from each trip.

3. Start as I mean to go on. Just hoping to complete the project...sometime!

Scared... three more trips happening in the next month. Eek!

4. Perimeters: Any trip which happened from Sept 1999 onwards shall be included since that was when I had my first passport made. Before then I travelled on my mother's passport. Either that or I lost previous passport. I don't remember. My memory is that bad!

(Blast from the past: Back in the 1980s, children would share a passport with a parent. I guess the assumption was that it would be pretty rare for a child to travel without a parent until they reached a certain age)


My two passports. Hoped I covered up all the secret details. Damn, did I look young!

Going backwards in time

Travel used to be so alluring to me. My childhood ambition was to be a Singapore girl and/or travel writer. I even applied to work for Singapore airlines but was not successful.

When I was small, holidays were once-yearly affairs to be looked forward to with bated breath. Oh the anticipation when my mother brought out the huge old suitcases (from my dad's old uni days) and made us empty our drawers to pack! The calling of the taxi that would bring us to the airport (we hardly took taxis anywhere then)! The deliciously adventurous smell I came to associate Changi with (probably just the musty carpet)!

These past couple of years, I have been fortunate enough to have had so much travel, I never even realised.

With familiarity, the excitement of travel had slowly been replaced with blase thoughts of  "oh no, the airport again" and an impatience with how slow fellow travellers and airport staff were in clearing customs, checking in, baggage checks etc.

Even when I was actually on holiday, I couldn't quite shake off the feeling of deja vu regardless of which city, town or country I was visiting-- everything seemed old and samey. So young yet so jaded. (joking!)

Slow as I am, on my latest holiday, I came to realise that, as with everything, one never appreciates what one has, especially if you get it too easily (a little like men, really)

So its time to walk down (fading) memory lane and celebrate each and every trip I have been lucky enough to have gone on.

This is my inspiration:

A little book of memories, kept by JAAM Guesthouse owner Arum, a young Korean hipster girl (stayed here during a recent trip to Seoul)-- ticket stubs and little notes she collected over 10 years of travelling.

Obviously I didn't have the foresight (or space) to keep these momentos. But I do have these:

Phone and hard disks of photos (printed even!), passport stamps. Yes baby, we gonna go a long way back in time.

Looking forward to reliving those memories!

RachQ